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the pursuit of happiness

by aaron ross

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1.
this magic will pass great healers amass energy fills up your glass you're a servant to the moon the world dies young last breath from its lungs it is getting the last laugh while awaiting the next crash there comes a day we all lose our way only darkness is our light we have reached another side there came an unknown entity that washed us clean of broken dreams please sing a song while i bleed and wont you read the tea leaves for me what have we done like gods with our guns killing everything in our path for a peace that never lasts burn it all down i have no love all that's left is aftermath ancient spirits gather ash no stars in the sky no sun and no moon they say that it's our land in the palm of their blood stained hands harness the powers that be carve your name in the family tree please explain what life means and wont you read the tea leaves for me this watershed moment became a waterfall and swept away them all those who tried to stop the ball from rolling pray to the dead ask them to spare our heads fire anoints the alter we gave our souls to whats left to hold baptized in their gold the sky falls like a fallen angel the beast rose up from the sea while dying drank from rites of spring I've laid down my shattered wing s wont you read the tea leaves for me
2.
they cant force feed me money I'll die a thief the killing joke's not funny they say what will be will be its a big world we're just sea glass we're the sand on the beach the big picture's moving too fast fast when you're sound asleep I wanna feel your love your calmness is my drug I'm not who I thought I was what unites us is our blood lost in the tide inside the dunes I was a slave time healed my wounds got no regrets I'm sunny got nowhere to be the land of milk and honey broken promises set you free the station's playing static we're in tune with the beat the resistance is automatic when we're living in harmony I wanna feel your love you can save me from the flood the ghost of an era is done reflections of how far we've come all of the teachers preaching doom I was consumed time healed my wounds the mission bells are ringing and it is time for tea the rivers swiftly flowing oh what a moment to be I can't help but feel persuaded can't help falling in love the end of the day I'm happy I made it I'm part of the making of I wanna feel your love like a moonbeam from above they told me ask the dust you get so alone at times that it just makes sense I wanna feel your love I'm a pusher for the shove like an olive branch from a dove the book of knowledge has just begun seeing the message in the runes I was a wreck time healed my wounds I knew to win I'd have to lose I was in fear time healed my wounds
3.
In new york somewhere That's where you’ll find me trying to join the 27 club The all seeing eye It led me blind I ended up killing all my love Seems like everybody They need a savior A superman to come and save the day My king is a queen I kneel at her throne I bow before mother nature’s face Without a woman Where would i be Without the 9 muses who mystify me I'm stuck in my footsteps Just waiting to get paid Though today is tomorrow's yesterday Don’t believe in the dream They provided For it really was a wolf in sheep's clothes The excitement of New worlds collided We took a fatal overdose Friends and enemies I left them behind I buried my head in the sky Felt like the lightning Struck deep inside When i looked into mother nature’s eyes Without a woman I’d have no hope I’d be in the quicksand at the end of my rope All that i’ve learned Was burned into my heart Tattooed with the tears That i bled in the dark Without a woman There’d be none of us We’d be deep in the abyss Particles of space dust Without a woman I’ve got nothing to say Don’t you burn out too soon Or else you’ll fade away Without a woman I'm lost in the weeds Trying to be someone That i’ll never be
4.
i lost all i did find lost all the keys to my mind you found a pathway inside the fountain of pain that i hide i'm not right i don't want to sink i don't want to swim i don't want to live these past lives again watch it fade to haze every shade of gray there are no words to say we are digging our graves traveling the highway we paved our hearts are falling like rain burning the memories we saved it's a shame i don't want to sink i don't want swim if weren't for foes i would have no friends some will play the game no matter how mundane there are no words to say home of the brave mind is depraved year of the monkey on your back can you behave act your age what if what saves you turns you mad from the black holes to the edge of the unknown standing on this rock that we call home a century is too long to be alone the only thing i own is my own these sacred bones i don't want to sink i don't want swim like the moment i was born gasping for oxygen don't want to make em pay there is another day there are no words to say i don't want to sink i don't want swim the worlds going backwards i'll keep ramblin like the flowers bloom in may the sun will fall in place there are no words to say quitting the stage sailing away on the road that has no bend what have we made marked in a cave to be great you must pretend a knowing thatX3 this will end the wall around you the wall surrounds you but walls were made To be broken
5.
You spilt blood on me I put it in writing The power you exercised The light from you was blinding I was so alone I could hear myself thinking I’m going to see the world Or else i'll die trying Robbed of the feeling of being young Living and dying by the gun The moment is gone like a fugitive I got left in the dust I don’t believe in love Cried into a bottle of wine While the two of you were fighting I took some sacrament It felt like i was flying The next day we went to the hills In steinbeck’s east of eden I'm going to find a higher plane Or else i'll die trying The night i drew the 5 of cups You told me i’d always have a crux The endless fix has broke me up I don’t give a fuck I don’t believe in love It’s a do no harm way to be We can heal ourselves of this disease In the golden age Trying to find the silver lining The voice keeps calling me I’ve succumb to it’s enchanting People wander through my life Though it feels like they are leaving I'm going to find the meaning Or else i'll die trying Guess i might as well press my luck It carries on with or without us Life isn’t something you can insure Everything is going to rust I don’t believe in love
6.
rebirth 07:38
The past is a widow with a silver mane She cries out your window for a dying day You have no fear inside you wear only your pain You greet your transgressions with a smile on your face Men make war and they taketh away But you only listen to what the forest says The earth is an island in the universe We walk it blindly looking for our rebirth I once loved a girl who enchained me like a snake She told me the moment was whatever you make I knew i never could make her happy in the end For happiness is in the eye of the beholder my friend The family curse was as real as a Hearst But you had been quenched with a different curse We took it at face value we didn't know our worth Bled our hearts of darkness looking for our rebirth The city like a meadow rolls over the rolling hills You’re somewhere out there in the sea of lights taking your share of pills We all cling to something even if it’s just smoke Singing along to the songs we wish we had wrote The highway leads to nowhere though it’s somewhere you have been The aura in the air is your long lost friend Letting go of old wounds they told you it would hurt You're in the valley of the shadow of death looking for your rebirth Underneath the bridge like Kurt Cobain Watching the decline of civilization’s reign There is no secret you just have your name We’re only entitled to the love that we gave If there is a god why’d they let us go We’ve been on our own since we've always known Another spirit another world We wander the river looking for our rebirth I lost faith in the feeling i was born with the blues Feel at one with the ocean and its impending doom I once danced with witchcraft use to play with the fire It strummed my heartstrings like apollo’s lyre I've always been running though i've never escaped I see now i'm here to learn what it takes Don’t know how long i'll live for don’t even know if it will work I look thru the looking glass looking for my rebirth It really could be nothing or could be all of your dreams Or it could be a cycle like the turning leaves Will we return as a new life or will we return to the dirt The soul is just a searcher looking for it’s rebirth
7.
made of dirt made of blood and tears a crystal mirror you look deep into the years the pain in me its how i'll always feel you've broken through you're above yourself looking down and the queen of diamonds with the painted eyelids and her moon in Capricorn shows you your palm lines are like faded road signs and the yoke you wear is worn married to the earth below my feet there is no curse no power runs that deep some day I'll cross the line drawn in the sand you've been to the gates all your tragedy is firsthand and the queen of diamonds takes a vow of silence as she tries to navigate the storm and she opens doorways that have been shut for centuries she brought you back here to be born harmony- ecstasy- energy killing me getting clean- haunted screen- finding this entity freedoms free-all you need- and all that you want to know is why carry on-when all is gone=fade into the alpenglow death is home-it goes slow-let's get metaphysical all or none-need no guns-we are the chosen ones consciousness-elements-even nothing has relevance Ahimsa -i am-i feel- i do-i love-i speak-i see-i understand
8.
Under your dominion I can finally see Been in and out of prison Really never have been free When i witnessed all there was You know i never really did think twice Life it has no calling card It’s gonna stab you in the back Breath out breath in When your world is shaken You have been hopeless you've been afraid Keep on rollin keep on rollin away Got a job at a factory Helped me pay my debts to the man There’s so much about this shit i wanna change Bout to cash out and go live off the land Gonna follow my intuition and listen to my eyes No longer gonna serve lord confusion Gonna leave all those empty voices behind Bleed out bleed in It’s ok you're just dreamin You have been wasted you've been afraid Keep on rollin keep on rollin away They're burning down hollywood I heard it through the grapevine Watch the fall of Babylon Nightly on primetime Money leaves a paper trail And it all burns in the flames of hell It’s a good day for a funeral It’s a good day to be alive Be out be in You are not what you pretend The door is open but you are afraid Keep on rollin keep on rollin away
9.
Turned on the station Heard about world war three Locked myself in my head Kept to my periphery Look up at the marble ceilin Aint it the prettiest thing you’ve ever seen I am always dreamin In the day and in between The center of the universe The cosmos must of been here first You won't find me on the new earth I'll never forget the way things used to look Write me a letter Send me your thoughts in prose She told me to forget her To carry on the open road The devil’s in the details He’ll meet you down at the county line I am always dreamin In the day and in the evening time The center of the universe Every time you go away it hurts I'm trying to contain your mirth I want to give up for what it’s worth The highest i've ever been Was when i fell deep into your life The strongest summer winds Drove me down the coastal highway To stand up on the mountain To walk the streets the visionaries walked I am always dreamin In the end and the great beyond

credits

released July 4, 2021

cello and backing vocals by Luke Janela

cover painting by Jessica Leigh Henry

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aaron ross Grass Valley, California

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